This storytelling might be a mirror for some, a cautionary tale, an epiphany or a permission slip. It may not be for you... but for someone you love. But mostly, it's a brain dump for me. These brain dumps are my process and a catalyst to change, evolving and transformation or sometimes just an awareness to be still and witness and I share because I wish someone would have shared with me.

Patterns can change.
People can change. Neuroscience says that it is so and I am living proof that it is possible.
I am a miracle and so are you.
So, if you are reading this wondering how the hell are you going to survive the next twenty-four hours, much less eight years, you can do it. Take it one moment at a time.
I am not an anomaly: there are over 23 million people doing recovery.

Getting sober doesn’t mean just quitting things. It doesn’t mean the fun in your life ends and that you need to move to a monastery in Israel in order to find peace and enlightenment and recovery. It also doesn’t mean that getting sober suggests that you are currently sleeping under a bridge, haven’t had a shower in weeks and everything you own resides in a shopping cart.

Educate yourself. Be kind to others rather than sit in judgement. Tiger’s DUI is a teachable moment. Talk to your kids, your students, the team that you coach. Ask questions. LISTEN to the answers. Provide space for an open conversation WITHOUT fear of consequence. Addiction does not care about your race, gender, education or social class. We are all at risk if we don’t educate ourselves, so let’s stop the blaming, shaming and condoning and get to work on listening, supporting and finding solution.

The New Year is upon us, and for many resolutions will be set and abandoned within the first 8 weeks of the year. Those resolutions were more than likely set to achieve some level of happiness – financial, physical or emotional.

THIS year, let’s quit some stuff in order to move towards happiness rather than adding, abandoning and then feeling the subsequent self-loathing for lack of achievement.

Inentional living takes effort.

Starting anything new takes effort because we don't quite know or understand the way.

Sometimes, knowing and understanding can be detrimental to our growth, healing + peace.

Expectation, grandeur, having too much (sugar), having too little (money), saying “yes” to one too many things, family discord, planning, cleaning, cooking, wrapping… it ALL can get to be a little too much.

The last decade has been full of change as I am sure MOST decades are...AND this past decade has been the most intentional & clear of them all.

The decision to take my life back and stop the toxic cycle of substance abuse was the catalyst and road back to me. It has been a journey that has been FAR from linear.

Do you wake up anxious? Stressed? Heart Racing?

Here is some information grounded in SCIENCE and a few ways to EASE your way back in to the day

Is the word RECOVERY getting in the way of you recovering?

You aren't the only one. I hear it all the time. People sometimes stop listening when I use the word. Their response (if they have one) is "I don't have a drinking or a drug problem."

For many years, my competitive drive was fueled by insecurity and lack of self worth. I wanted to do well at school to please the teachers. I wanted to play golf and soccer well to be accepted by my peers, I wanted to complete marathons for the praise.

AS IF ALL OF THAT WOULD SHRINK THE HOLE OF SELF LOATHING. SPOILER ALERT: IT DIDN'T.

I WASN'T PREPARED FOR THIS AND I AM GUESSING YOU WEREN'T EITHER.

Last Friday, I was at a training for a new job and the major selling point for the new position was how busy I would be. They were experiencing record sales and the next six months were expected to be booming.

How many times have you either said the above quote or been the recipient of it? It seems benign. It certainly seemed that way to me until I took a deeper dive.

When I was self medicating, I used the phrase "that wasn't my intention", A LOT. It shifted the focus, the blame, the misunderstanding on to the other person. I wasn't doing this maliciously, it was just "my way" and apparently, I didn't know any better.

Here we are, NINE days in to 2020.

Did you make a resolution for the New Year? If you did and you already have forgotten what it is was, don't feel bad. 91% of people will quit what they set out to do by mid February.